Bumpire (a)

“You gotta be kidding me, kid.”
For the first time since he picked up the trail three weeks ago, he gets a clear, unobstructed look at his quarry.  It’s a young woman, late teens or early twenties, with tangled dirty blonde hair stuffed into a stained knitted cap; he can’t tell if the color of her hair is natural, or from actual dirt.  She’s dressed in washed-out jeans with holes in the knees, and a down coat with so many feathers poking out of the holes she must have found it in the trash.  A bum.  Three weeks’ worth of sleepless nights, stakeouts, and bloodstains; thirteen crime scenes in alleyways or moonlit backroads, all for one rogue vampire, and she’s an honest-to-God bum.
“What the hell is this?” he shouts at her, flashlight trained on her just as accurately as his revolver.  “What the hell am I looking at here?!  Is this some kind of joke?!”
“I got no clue what you mean, old man,” she replies apathetically, still squinting in pain from the bullet in her thigh.
“Shut up!  You start sassing me and I will end you.  What the hell kind of vampire ARE you?!”
“Uhh, a broke one?”
He smirks in satisfaction.  “You’re damn right I broke you.  Plenty more where that came from.”
“No, damn it, I mean like broke.  You think I’d be wearing this crap if I actually had money?  God, my leg!”
His smirk gives way to skepticism; he begins to feel the burn in his outstretched arms as gravity tries to pull them down.  “What do you mean money?  You stole their wallets!”
“Pssh, yeah, and they had like, fifty bucks in ’em!  Burn through that just paying for a room and a bus to the next town.”


{So I’m sitting there, asking myself, why are so many vampires rich, or at least upper class?  What happened to all the middle-class vampires, or low-class vampires?  What would life as a vampire be like when you don’t have the cash to do whatever you want?  Wouldn’t they be not that much different from a druggie, a slave to a crippling and addictive need, living day to day on scraps without any toys to momentarily distract them from their next fix?}

{So I thought I’d write a bit of that.}


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